Sunday, November 25, 2012

This Brought Tears To My Eyes...

Two weeks ago I came upon a documentary about Benji Wilson on ESPN. Prior to watching the documentary I had never heard of Benji Wilson. This documentary and his story brought tears to my eyes. His story tore at my heart. The only other black biographies that have cut as deep are Whitney Houston, Florence Ballard and Dorothy Dandridge. If I could, I would bring all of the above back from the dead.

I'm not a sports fanatic. I'm not sure how I ended up watching ESPN the night I caught this documentary, but I'm glad I did.

Benji Wilson was a star high school basketball player in Chicago. During the early 1980's he was considered the best high school basketball player in the country. By all accounts he was going to do big things in the NBA. Unfortunately that dream was never full-filled because Benji's life was cut short by some misguided punk.

According to the documentary, Benji was walking his girlfriend, Jetun Rush, to the bus stop. The two of them were in the middle of a heated argument because she wouldn't let Benji see his son. They had a two month old son together and Jetun was supposedly keeping the child away from Benji. While walking her to the bus stop Benji bumped into the misguided punk and all hell broke loose. Long story short, egos flared and the misguided punk shot Benji. What followed was gross negligence thanks to Chicago's fucked up emergency response policy.

Benji died of his wounds.

I know Jetun Rush must be hunted by his death. If she was keeping Benji away from his son she has to live with the following:
  1. When her son had a father she kept them apart. 
  2. Benji died arguing with her about seeing his son and due to his tragic death he will never see or hold his son again.
  3. Her last conversation with Benji was an argument. Granted she was a teenage girl at the time, but I'm sick of hearing stories about black mothers using their children as tools against the father(s) of their children. If you have a black man that is TRYING to be a father to his child LET HIM! Don't use the children as a weapon in your civil war with the father.
As for the misguided punk...I hope that motherfucker burns in hell. I'm sick and tired of black thugs and hoodrats. Their reign of terror over the black community has come at a serious price. Fortunately I'm not the only one feeling this way....


The civil war between law abiding black people and uncivilized savage niggas is on and least in Detroit. 

Black people in Detroit are finally standing up and saying ENOUGH! Good for them! Maybe Atlanta, Philly, Oakland, Newark and all other crime ridden black meccas will follow suit. Black people not living in Detroit need to donate money and services to their cause. I'm more than willing to donate funds that will go towards purchasing grenade launchers, AK-47s, pistols, uzis etc...if it means ridding the black community of the ghetto masses. 

If you read the comments under the above Detroit 300 video there are black people who actually DISAGREE with the approach of these brave men. There are people saying, "We shouldn't declare war on our self-hating black youth," "When are we going to fight the white man and corporate America? We shouldn't be fighting each other" and my personal favorite, "These brothers ain't nothing but Uncle Toms. They are working with law enforcement and turning our black youth over to the white man. They are traders to the race!"

What fucking world are some of these people living in? 

I must have missed where Bill Gates and Donald Trump are out raping old black women and killing little black children. I must have missed where our beloved black youth are innocent of tearing down whole communities and turning them into war zones. White men aren't doing that shit! Instead it's young fucked up black men doing it. It's about time someone did something about it. 

These bastards don't give a damn about other black people so why the hell should law abiding citizens give a crap about them?

Anyone tired of all this senseless violence needs to stand up and support the folks doing something about it.

Monday, November 19, 2012

The Best Damn Feeling In The World: An Orgasm

I have the best girlfriend in the world. Yesterday, after our day on the town, Yellow Bone and I had the bathroom, on the bathroom countertop, in front of the bathroom mirror. I don't know if it was the thrill of watching my reflection in the mirror as I screwed my girlfriend or the sex itself, but my orgasm was one of the deepest I have ever felt.

The whole event started out innocent enough... 

Yellow Bone was standing in front of her bathroom mirror brushing her hair and she was playing  Surrender by Kut Klose on her stereo...  

She was almost completely naked except for a sapphire blue thong. Her pretty titties looked as delicious as ripe fruit. As noticed them immediately as I walked into the bathroom and stood behind her in the mirror. I watched as she brushed her hair. She caught me staring. 

Yellow Bone: (Smiling) What are you looking at?

Me: I'm looking at you and this body!

At that point I slapped her ass. 

Yellow Bone: (Turned towards me and pointed the brush) Hey! Don't start nothing you can't finish!

Me: (Smiling and biting down on my lower lip) Who said I can't finish it?

And finish it I did! Right there on the bathroom countertop! 

I started off slowly sucking on her breast and made my way down. I feasted on Yellow Bone's box for about forty-five minutes while periodically checking out my reflection in the mirror. I watched in the mirror as her spine pulsated to the rhythm of her moans, which gradually grew louder. This continued until eventually she let out a long slow moan and her body began to convulse in pleasure.

And then it was my turn...

Yellow Bone can suck the paint off a car! This chick will have your eyes rolling straight to the back of your head. She seems to know just the right spot to hit. It doesn't take much to get me horny. My sex drive is high. I like to fuck! It's just my luck that I have a girl that likes to fuck as much as me! 

Anyway, Yellow Bone sucked and fucked me so good right there on the bathroom countertop and I swear I was squirting for at least 45 seconds. 

That was some good head!

After it was over all I wanted to do was lay down and sleep. You know the shit is good when you end up in a coma afterwards.

Sunday, November 18, 2012

A Date With My Girlfriend

Today Yellow Bone and I went to see Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2 and I must say I REALLY enjoyed the movie! It was good. I loved everything about it. I only recently got into the Twilight Saga and it's very addictive. I wish we had this kind of entertainment when I was a teenager. Watching this film series and reading the books got me thinking...where are the BLACK teen love stories? 

I know black folks aren't into vampire romance novels. I can understand. We're used to vampires that want to suck our blood...not the type that want to fuck! So yeah I get it. However, it would have been nice if there was a series like this when I was growing up instead of Flyy Girl or The Coldest Winter Ever

As a young teenage girl, I wished I could read about HEALTHY black relationships. I wished there were black love stories like those written by Danielle Steel. I believe teenage girls need that type of reading material. Maybe if more young black girls had that type of reading material they would think about love...true love...and not just sex. Maybe they would even raise their standards and force these wayward black boys to step their game up.

I wonder if a black lesbian vampire romance novel would sell?

Anyway, Yellow Bone and I really enjoyed the film. She keeps telling me I should write the black lesbian love story I desire to read. It's definitely on my list of things to do.

The Intersection Of Race & Class: The Interesting Position Of The Black Bourgeoisie

As I age I find myself dealing with a number of issues related to class and race. I never faced these issues before becoming a member of the black middle class. Moving up in the world is great and I am enjoying the fruits of my labor and education. However, moving up has forced me to examine class and race from my new middle class perspective. I have been thinking about my future, my plight, the plight of other African Americans and what it means for me.

Sometime in the near future I plan to buy a house. There was a point when I wanted to buy a house in the Atlanta area. That is no longer the case. Why? Because I'm convinced this city is going straight to hell like Detroit, Chicago, D.C., Gary, Philly, Harlem, Cleveland, Newark and every other so-called black mecca. I've lived in Georgia my entire life. This is the land of my ancestors on both sides of my family. I've lived in Atlanta since 2004. In that time I have watched the following:

  1. Black people from all over the country are migrating here because they have heard it is the place to be...for whatever reason. 
  2. The poor have become poorer.
  3. Someone figured out concentrated poverty is a bad idea so the poor are now spread out thanks to section 8 vouchers. Gone are the projects. Now these folks can find private housing in "good" apartment communities and the suburbs. This is great for them. However, it sucks for the people already living in those communities. Why? Because our stupid BLACK Democratic leadership has yet to recognize that poverty is not just financial for a large number of black's also a mentality. Folks living in these previously NICE neighborhoods now find themselves living amongst folks who don't have any type of home training, discipline or morals. Not to mention they don't have any interest in keeping up the neighborhood because the cost of living there isn't coming out of their pocket. It's just a matter of time before the people in the community move out and the poverty is concentrated again. I wrote a post about this on Facebook. Go HERE to check it out.
  4. The school system here is one of the most fucked up school systems in the country. I'm sure you've heard about the cheating scandal that made national news. 
  5. The government and the school board is mediocre and corrupt as hell. The mayor of Atlanta suffers from a speech impediment and I struggle to understand why/how he was elected. Leadership in this city sucks big time and it has for a long time.
In short, Atlanta is not a place I want to buy a home or raise a family. This brings me to my next issue...

The black middle class is in a very unique position in this country. Like most Americans, we want good quality housing for our families, good performing schools for our children and crime free neighborhoods with clean accessible stores within a short mile radius. These things are not often found in communities that are dominated by blacks. Instead they are almost always found in areas dominated by whites (at least here in the south). Therefore, members of the black middle class often take up residence in majority white neighborhoods. 

For the first two or so years all is well for them. Then suddenly they look up and find there are a number of FOR SALE signs going up in the neighborhood. They realize that all the people selling are WHITE and all the people buying are BLACK. Hell, even they bought their house from a white family.

The white neighbor who previously had no problem with you and the other black family living around the corner now finds himself alarmed by the changing demographics of the neighborhood and the surrounding school system. He decides to pack up and move. He sells his house (which has depreciated in value given the change in demographics) for a BARGAIN price to a black family and leaves. 

Now about five years in their home, the black middle class family, suddenly find themselves living amongst a black majority in a community that five years earlier was almost completely white. Like their previously white neighbors, they have watched as the value of their home depreciated with the rampant "blacking" of the neighborhood. Homes that previously cost $160,000 are now going for $120,000. 

At first this new black majority seems no different than the previous white majority. The neighbors are polite and friendly. Everyone is black and middle class. Everyone gets along fine. Everyone is maintaining their yards and their homes. The neighborhood is the face of black success. They all agree they got a good deal from the whites who previously lived in the neighborhood, though none of them are in denial as to why they got such a good deal. 

The neighborhood gains a reputation as the place to be if you are BLACK and MIDDLE CLASS. The original black middle class family looks around and is pleased to see so many black families like their own living amongst them. For a while it's a great place to live.  

But then something begins to happen.  

Black people, who could only dream about living in the neighborhood before, now find they can afford to live in said neighborhood due to it's declining value and prices...and so it begins. 

Bad elements begin to invade the neighborhood. Black middle class families watch helplessly as young black men walk around their neighborhood with their shirts off and pants half-way down their ass. Loud music blast from homes and cars in the middle of the night when folks should be sleeping. There have been reports of home invasions and car break-ins. The high end stores that surrounded the neighborhood previously begin to close shop. They are replaced by liquor stores, Family Dollar, Taco Bell and pawn shops.

The school system has gone completely to hell. The children from black middle class families come home and report they aren't able to learn because the teacher has to stop teaching every five minutes to discipline Lil Ray Ray, the class clown. 

At this point black middle class families have a choice: They can either cut their losses and sell their homes to other black families looking to move into the community or they can continue living in the neighborhood, install bars on their windows and watch as their once middle class neighborhood becomes a full-fledged ghetto...and at that point it would be damn near impossible to get rid of the property or get a moderately good return on their original purchase price.

This is the kind of stuff I think about and fear. I'm sure I am not alone. I have seen it happen time and time again. It happened to the black middle class community I lived in shortly before my parents separated. It has happened to my mother's neighborhood and it's slowly happening to my father's neighborhood.

I don't believe in forcing myself into a situation where I'm clearly not wanted due to the color of my skin (referring to white communities), but at the same time I don't want to live in a majority black community either because they go to hell at some point and they lack the structure and resources to sustain over the long-run. 

This is the position members of the black middle class find ourselves in at some point when considering buying a home. We can either buy a home in a white neighborhood and move when we see the white folks starting to move or we can buy a home in a black neighborhood and watch as the values of our homes depreciate faster than they would in a majority white neighborhood...not to mention the situation with the school system, stores etc. 

The only other alternative (and this only applies to the SUPER well-to-do black folks) is to buy a home in a neighborhood that very few people can afford to live regardless of race. This is probably not a realistic option for most members of the black middle class.

I honestly would not mind living in a majority black community if said community didn't go to hell at some point. Enclaves of middle class black families are almost ALWAYS invaded by bad elements. We can never have nice, quiet, peaceful, well-maintained, crime free communities because a lot of black folks are fucked up beyond repair. Let me explain...

White people, for better or worse, value their communities. They know the value of their property. They know their homes are their biggest investments. They take great pride in their homes and communities. You won't catch them littering their communities, pissing on the sides of buildings, loitering on street corners, walking around looking like thugs in their neighborhood or selling drugs in their neighborhood because they KNOW what that shit will do to their property value.

Certain black people are the complete opposite. 

I have seen black folks throw thrash on the sidewalk, in the neighbor's yard, in front of the neighborhood public library etc. I have seen black folks pissing on the side of the public library. At some point black folks stop giving a damn about their property values (and maybe this comes from financial ignorance). They let their homes become dilapidated and their yards look a mess. The only thing they add to their homes are BARS on the windows and doors. In a community where this is the norm (meaning every house on the block looks like this) said community is labeled the GHETTO.

Why the hell can't black people have nice things without everything going to hell? Why don't we value our communities the way that whites value their communities? Why can't our neighborhoods look and function like those of whites? Why can't we sustain polished upstanding black middle class enclaves?

Think about that for a second. 

How many black middle class enclaves have you seen sustained for decades? I can't think of any. But I can think of several white middle/upper class communities from my hometown that have been around since the town was founded!

This shit is sad, but it's the reality that black middle class people have to face in this country. I'm convinced that class and race hurts the black middle class more than any other group. We cannot fully assimilate into white communities and we cannot fully escape the trappings of the black community. 

It sucks to be us sometimes.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

The Man That Changed My Life

When I was a junior at Spelman College my favorite professor introduced me to Derrick Bell. I was taking Race Racism and American Law. The required textbook for the class was written by Derrick Bell. I was so intrigued by the book and the author that I began searching more information about him. 

Derrick Bell was one of the few black men I respected (R.I.P) in this world. Mr. Bell put his career on the line to protest Harvard University's shameful hiring practices. It seems Harvard didn't believe in making black women tenured professors and as a result Mr. Bell gave Harvard his ass to kiss!

Derrick Bell changed my life.

His books introduced me to socially conscious science I call it. As an aspiring writer searching for my voice, his profound storytelling opened my eyes to all the social ills that can be explored through science fiction. I began writing stories about race, racism, sexism, colorism and classism. After YEARS of toil and pain, I'm finally releasing my first socially conscious science fiction novel. I plan to release the novel, which is the first in a series, sometime in January.

I wanted to share Mr. Bell's work on my blog. His most famous science fiction story is The Space Traders. This story made me fall in love with science fiction. I started imagining worlds where black people reign supreme, where gender roles are switched and women dominate, where a whole population of women (in the case of my novel, black women) can disappear off the face of the planet without a trace. 

Like I said, Mr. Bell changed my life. 

The Space Traders was turned into a short film in the 1990s. It aired on a short-lived HBO series called Cosmic Slop (think of it as a Black Twilight Zone or Outer Limits). The video up above is that short film. Here is a link to the actual story written by Derrick Bell


Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Am I A Bitch Or Am I Too Damn Honest?!?

Sometimes I can be cold-blooded and tactless on this blog. I speak my mind to the fullest on this blog. If you've been following this blog long enough you know I don't hold a damn thing back. I write what I'm thinking. I think that's why some of you read my blog. It's not politically correct. It's probably something you sat around thinking yourself, but never had the nerve to say yourself. 

Yesterday night/early this morning I was involved in a confrontation with a chick who landed on my blog bitching and complaining because I was supposedly using her picture on a blog post (here is the link). The woman came at me completely out of nowhere on some disrespectful shit. Mind you, I have never had a conversation with this chick, never even heard of her before yesterday. I found her picture the same way I find all my pictures on this blog: Google Image Search. I remember I typed "Obese black lesbian studs" or something like that in the search.  Her picture came up!

This woman said I was using her picture on my blog and after calling me a "dumb ass" she demanded I remove it. 

Bad move BITCH! 

I don't take kindly to threats. I refused to remove the picture. The woman continued to come at me sideways and her facebook followers decided to jump in on the action. Again, I refused to remove it. Finally, I received an email from one of my readers on this blog who asked me to remove it. I removed the picture out of respect for this particular reader. 

Even after I removed the picture this woman and her facebook followers CONTINUED to fuck with me. That got me thinking...there is more to this story than some fat sloppy heifer who is angry because I jacked her picture from Google search. 

All day I have been receiving emails from folks who are offended by the blog post in question. In that post I described my observations of ATLANTA STUDS. Why were folks so angry about that blog? My answer: It was too damn honest.

These folks are angry because I had the nerve to say the studs I run across in Atlanta are either short and obese or skinny and flat-chested Lil Wayne looking motherfuckers. They are angry because I had the nerve to ask where are the good-looking studs with CURVES and some sense of femininity. They are angry because I had the nerve to point out the reality that most of the studs I run across here are working dead-end bullshit jobs at Wal-Mart, McDonalds, Burger King and don't have shit going for themselves.

If these fools don't think their plight in life is largely limited by their inability to conform to society's standards of femininity I feel sorry for them. I'm not saying it's right, but it's the world we live in at the moment. 

Be honest, how many successful hardcore black stud attorneys, engineers, doctors have you seen??? I haven't seen any (the only exception I know is a chick who is a doctor, but even she conforms to femininity while on the job).

The particular chick who got mad about me posting her picture on said blog doesn't even look like a woman to me. When I first ran across her picture I had to stare extra hard to conclude she is a woman. I'm not saying that to be funny. I'm not saying that to be sexist or whatever. I'm being honest. I originally thought she was a man! That may not be the politically correct thing to say. It may be tactless and harsh. And yes, I know femininity and masculinity is defined by society and social norms. I know I'm conditioned. But real talk, this woman physically fits what I often run across here in ATLANTA....masculine, overweight, short, manish and in my eyes overall physically unattractive.

Now I don't know her personally. I don't know a thing about her. I cannot tell you jack shit about her character (expect what I've seen in the last two days...and honestly she comes across as bitch). All I can comment on is what I've seen of her physically, which in my opinion is unattractive. 

People can say, "LezIntellect, you're shallow." or "LezIntellect, you shouldn't judge a book by its cover." That's all well and good...that's the politically correct thing to say...but that is NOT the world we live in right now. If you don't first appeal to me PHYSICALLY I'm not sticking around to get to know your character. 

Masculine women don't appeal to me. Flat-chested masculine women who look like middle school aged boys don't appeal to me. Obese masculine women don't appeal to me. In Atlanta that's about 99.9% of the black lesbians studs I run across on a daily basis. I asked why? Folks got their feelings hurt.

Even though Yellow Bone is forbidden from reading my blog, I asked her to read the particular blog in question. After having a long hard laugh she said, "You're speaking the truth, but you could be more tactful. Everyone isn't blessed with a cute face and body like you. Just be mindful of that." 

Sunday, November 11, 2012

I've Been Busy

I haven't had time to blog because I have a lot on my plate. I'm applying to graduate school (I've decided to pursue my PH.D). When I'm not spending time with Yellow Bone I'm usually at work. So, I don't have time to blog right now. Hopefully I will have more time to myself this weekend. I'll make an effort to blog either Friday night or Saturday morning.

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Toni Braxton...Wow!


It's Saturday morning and I'm sitting in my recliner watching The Soul Story on VH1 Soul. The Soul Story is a program on VH1 Soul that devotes a whole hour to playing videos by a R&B artist. Today they are playing Toni Braxton's videos. I'm sitting here watching her early 1990's videos with drool running down the corner of my mouth!

Toni Braxton in the 1990's was bad as hell! The video up above is my personal favorite. Toni Braxton and Halle Berry put the short cut on the map and made it look so damn good! I remember after Toni Braxton hit the scene black women (including my mother) began rocking a short cut. 

Looking at Toni Braxton in this video I can honestly say when black women have themselves together we are the baddest women in the world!

I don't know if Toni Braxton has had any plastic surgery or not, but she doesn't look the same to me. She doesn't look quite as attractive to me as she did in the early 1990's. I think it's the ridiculous weave she wears now. She is still a pretty woman, but Toni Braxton in the 1990's was the SHIT! She needs to go back to the short cut.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

My Woman...What A Woman!

The lease on my apartment is almost up and I'm trying to decide whether or not I will renew it. As much as I love my studio apartment and as much as I love living alone I think I want a roommate. The benefits of having a roommate cannot be ignored. A roommate will allow me to keep more money in my pocket because we will split rent and utilities. I won't have to worry about being alone in the place when Yellow Bone is not around to keep me company (yes, I worry about my personal safety even though I live in a fairly quiet community...I mean this is Atlanta). So, I'm seriously considering giving up my studio and seeking a larger apartment with a roommate. 

Naturally when I thought about getting a roommate Yellow Bone came to mind. When I moved into my studio I said my next roommate would be my permanent life partner. I have never lived with a girlfriend before, but I've always been open to the idea.  I approached Yellow Bone with the idea...

Me: Baby, how do you feel about getting a place together?

Yellow Bone: mean living together?

Me: Yes.

Yellow Bone: Hell no! If I give you the milk for free you would have absolutely no reason to purchase the cow!

Me: (Shocked because I honestly expected her to jump for joy at the suggestion): No? Seriously, you won't even consider the idea?

Yellow Bone: Yeah, I'll consider the idea....when you put a ring on my finger and we're married!

All I could do is shake my head. The more I learn about Yellow Bone the more I love her. Nothing but respect for a woman who knows her worth and demands better. I have something woman...what a woman!

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