Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Do You Believe Everyone Has A Soulmate?


Do you believe everyone has a soulmate? If so, how do we know when/if we've found that person? Why do so many people end up single for long periods of time? Is it possible to overlook your soulmate? How do you know it's not a crush? How do you know it's not lust? Are soulmates destined to become lovers? Is it possible to just be friends with your soulmate?

I think I've found my soulmate.

I feel something special for this woman. I haven't felt this way in a LONG LONG LONG time. Part of me is afraid of this feeling. Another part of me hopes she is the real deal because I'm tired of searching for her. Another part of me hopes she feels the same way and that my feelings are not unrequited.

It feels so good to know that I'm not alone anymore. It feels so good to know there is someone out there that shares my likes, dislikes, goals, dreams and beliefs. It feels so good to know there is someone out there just like me. But I'm still scared to death of this feeling...

I've had my share of women. Some of my relationships with women have been built solely on lust. One or two have been rebound relationships. Some have been...well...to be completely honest mistakes. Some have been short-term (I mean a few weeks or months at the most).

I have only loved two women. 

I don't know why I didn't love the others. They were just there to take up space in my life at that moment in time. Perhaps the main difference between the women I have loved and those I did not love is the emotional connection I felt with those I loved.

When the women I have loved cried I felt like crying (and often times I did). If something was bothering them, it bothered me too. If they were in pain, I was in pain too. I would do and say anything to make them feel better. If I had the power, I would move heaven and hell to make them happy. Again, I have only felt this way about two women.

Would I considered either of these women my soulmate? No.

Why? Because our differences far outweighed whatever emotional connection I felt with them. I imagine if either of them were truly my soulmate our differences wouldn't mean a damn thing. Nothing would keep us apart. No one would be able to come into our relationship and tear us apart.

I'm rambling (I'm tired and sleepy right now), but I want to know how do we know if we've found our soulmate?

In the past I thought maybe I was guilty of overlooking my soulmate. I believe that typically happens for most of us because we stay chasing people based on superficial bullshit (i.e., the chicks with the phattest butts and the prettiest faces...guilty as charged!). But it's really not about that. Life isn't about that. Beauty fades. I think a soulmate is someone that appeals to you on a deeper level (maybe I'm growing wiser in my old age).

For me a soulmate is someone that immediately lights a spark inside of you...that isn't easily lit. I think it happens randomly...and when we least expect it. I feel warm inside whenever I hear her voice. When we speak to each other sparks fly. I'm so happy to hear from her whether it's through a text message or by phone. She came into my life and I quickly became smitten. For various reasons this cannot be lust or a crush. I believe it is something much deeper.

A soulmate is someone that makes you feel something deep inside that you don't often feel for another individual...not even with the person you're with (though it might pain you to admit this reality).

That is the way I feel about this woman. I guess only time will tell if she is the one....
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