Thursday, October 1, 2009

Lesbian Sues Bisexual Ex-Girlfriend For Falsely Representing Herself Throughout The Course Of Their Relationship


San Diego, CA—In a court battle that's sure to send shockwaves through the Lesbian Bisexual Gay and Transgender community (LBGT), Kimberly Evans, an emergency room physician is suing her long time ex-girlfriend, Deidra Grady, a flight attendant for falsely representing herself throughout the course of their relationship.

Evans, who is acting as her own attorney, charges that Grady lied to her for six years about her sexual orientation. "In the six years we were together Deidra led me to believe she was gay. I moved her into my home, paid for her to learn training as a dental hygienist, which she wasted my money pursuing, and I bought her a brand new car. I took care of Deidra when she was sick. I made sure she never had to worry about money, and I even paid for her mother's stay at an upscale nursing home. As far as I'm concern Deidra owes me."

The defendant, Deidra Grady, maintains Evans knew about her bisexuality from the time the two started dating. "I was always upfront with Kimberly about my past with men. She knew of my attraction to both men and women. She chose to ignore it. Kimberly wanted to be with me despite my sexuality. She told me as long as that part of my life was in the past we were cool."

The couple's love affair came to a screeching halt when Grady's bisexuality went on display in an unimaginable way. She along with a man who has been identified as the late Kyle Parker, a real estate developer and married father of two, were wheeled into Evans' emergency room attached at their libidos. The two were in the process of making love when Parker suffered a massive heart attack right on top of Grady.

"His body stiffen while he was still inside of her," said a nurse who was pulling double duty the night of the incident. "I've never seen anything like it in my life. I can't imagine how the doctors managed to...um...separate the two of them. I wasn't allowed in the room during the procedure."

Evans, who was on duty the night her ex-girlfriend Grady, and her lover were wheeled into the emergency room, recounted her feelings upon first setting eyes on the scene. "It was heartbreaking and embarrassing all at the same time. It felt like someone had punched me in the stomach."

Judge Carol Bailey called the case “highly unusual and extremely interesting.”

Never the less Judge Bailey dismissed the case. “There isn’t a law that says people can’t lie about their background. We cannot go around suing people simply because they break our hearts.”

At the time of press Evans wasn't available for addition comment. Grady had this to say after the  judge's verdict, "I'm sorry things had to end this way. I'm happy that it's over. One thing I know for sure is that I will never crave another dick as long as I live!"

*Note this post is satire. Welcome to the brilliant mind of LezIntellect!
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